There are two kinds of alien species secretly living on Earth among us. The Insectoids and the Reptilians. Humans have been slaves to the Reptilians for millenia, and we've been good slaves to them and they really want us to stay that way, so they protect us from the Insectoids who want nothing more to eat every last one of us.
In America the aliens have taken control of Government and split it into two opposing factions. The Insectoids have become the Democratic Party while the Reptilians have taken control of the Republican Party.
Monsanto is also run by the Reptilians who are creating genetically modified food that when eaten make humans taste terrible to the Insectoids, which is at this point the only thing keeping a full scale "harvest" invasion from occurring which would also mean all out war between the Reptilians and the Insectoids.
The technology that is used is known as the Monsanto Terminator Genetics. Some claim this is just so that when you buy a fertilized seed to plant your crops, the plant it grows will only produce dormant and dead seeds. This is just not the case, even Monsanto isn't that evil!
Those who urge "healthy eating habits" are actually Insectoid propagandists. They do not want you to live longer happier lives, they just want you to be healthy cattle for the slaughter when the Insectoids attack and they battle Reptilians over our servitude or fooditude.
The Reptilian Republican candidates make it very clear that they will defend us as long as we are good slaves. They've been building a defense grid that you and I can only dream about, but it should be a great help in the upcoming invasion. Reagan called it "Star Wars", Bush called it "Operation Yee-ha Cowboy".
The Insectoid Democrats tell you everything you want to hear to get you into a vulnerable spot only to cook and eat your flesh, assuming you shop at Whole Foods and not Price Chopper with all those terrible GMOs that make you taste like dogpoo.
